It’ll hit you like a ton of bricks..the numbness inside.

A week later and you’re still sitting here more lost and confused than ever…you have no answers and you have no explanation and all that’s left is you alone with your own imagination creating ideas and filling the gaps with excuses and make believe reasoning. Truth is, there is no explanation. There is no closure other than the fact that maybe that is the closure…there is none. You weren’t given an explanation because let’s be serious..nothing you could tell me at this point would suffice. I could counter every single word you could possibly come up with. The fact of the matter is – it sucks. It hurts and is more importantly..disappointing.

It’s tough not knowing. It’s tough being left alone to interpret the entire situation. It all seems like a blur at this point. All the days blend together to form a magnificent period of time in my life. But what do I have to show for it now except for a confused mind and a throbbing heart? I guess it wasn’t supposed to be easy.. I guess it was supposed to teach me something. Granted, I learned a lot but to be quite honest, a lesson wasn’t all I was looking for. But you knew that, and you still left anyways.

So I’ll carry on like I always do. You just gotta pick your shit and your heart off the floor don’t you dare stop moving. Don’t you for one more second let people get the best of you. You chose to give the best of you and he ripped it away like the selfish bastard he is. Keep doing your best anyways. They’ll expect you to give up and be crippled by this experience. I say surprise them… Figure it out. Use this as the propeller that guides your next adventure. Cause after all, that’s what this was…one hell of an adventure.

You are who you are,

Brilliantly Lost

If Time Stood Still

Do you ever wonder how different life would be if we have the power to make time stand still? We could slow down a moment, catch our breath, collect our thoughts, then proceed to live our lives. Sometimes things happen at whirlwind speed and you just want to scream “STOP”, but it doesn’t stop, it doesn’t slow, the world keeps on turning whether you’re ready for the ride or not.

The spinning never ends. You feel the need and want to stop for just a second, take a rest, put life on pause so you can make rational decisions, so you can process what’s happening, so you can plan what you will say…but the decisions become flawed, the process is familiarly confusing, and the words get spit out before our brains have time to realize what is going on.

Life will consume you. It’s anxiety provoking ways can push so heavily on your chest, restrict your breathing, and fog your judgement. Things either happen all at once, or nothing at all..there is no balance. They tell us to try and find our inner peace, but in order to do so we must quiet our minds and follow our hearts. Well our hearts don’t have brains and the beating of it is so loud it makes it heart to concentrate. Life will consume you, it will drown you and make you question which foot to put before the other.

Maybe if time stood still, we could stop running from the answers. We could stop running from ourselves and our demons. If time stood still, maybe the answer would become clear. Maybe the answer would be simply that there is no answer at all…

You are who you are,

Brilliantly Lost