Awake

Have you ever been awoken by a shiver? It startles your body and you gasp for air as you open your eyes. It’s such a weird feeling…for what at exact moment decided to wake your body so suddenly. At first you are in a daze, but within seconds you are wide awake.

I have always said that everything happens for a reason…and I believe that when things like that happen – it is because someone, somewhere in the world is thinking of us at that exact moment and they send a vibe out into the world and every so often those vibes connect with us and reach us. The mind and heart are a powerful thing.

So when you wake up in a panic and can’t get back to sleep…see it as someone out there loves you, is thinking about you..regardless of what happens from here on out – for that moment your body and the universe were perfectly aligned. Know your thoughts of goodness and positivity have the power to reach someone else.

Believe in that. When all hope is lost…please believe in that.

You are who you are,

Brilliantly Found (and awake)

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Give and Take

There are givers and there are takers.

There are some who take, time and time again, simply because they are greedy and too selfish to give back. May they take their presence elsewhere.There are others who take because their broken spirits have nothing left to give. May they take from the open hearts of others with gratitude and fill their hearts with hope.

Some givers keep on giving from the goodness of their hearts, hoping to mend the broken spirits of others.
Other givers give to disguise their own fear of feeling worthy of taking what other givers have to offer.

Every once in awhile, every so often, you will meet people who balance your give and take so perfectly that the line between the two starts to blend into one.They give all they have in trust that you will not take more than you require and when you reciprocate the giving – they take it with grace, not greed. That my friends, is what we call friendship, beauty, and love. They are three of the same all blended together to form the cycle of give and take.

Thanks to the ones in my life who understand the importance of both. I am grateful for your lessons of showing me it’s okay to be a gracious taker and it is liberating and rewarding being an honest giver. May you take what you need to keep you going and give your love to others when they need it most.

You are who you are,

Beautifully Found (Thanks to the givers in my life)

Exhaustion.

It’s really exhausting you know..being this sad all the time.

Sometimes you find yourself smiling, but like clockwork..the sadness creeps in and you realize it never left – it has always lingered.
It’s not even loneliness..that’s not what I would call it. It’s and overbearing sadness that washes over you and leaves your heart aching. You want to cry but no tears fall, because you are just so exhausted. You are so tired of being sad, you are so tired of hating yourself for being so sad, you are tired of it not getting better.

It feeling less heavy during the day for a few hours is NOT it getting better. It’s putting it off, not getting to the root of the problem. Depression is a wicked thing. It consumes you. Happiness doesn’t seem like a sunny day..happiness in an anxiety driven world looks like survival. If you get out of bed in the morning without crumbling to the ground…that is progress, that is what your happy day looks like. I’m tired of that. I want more. I want to be more and reach more and do more and just be someone who sees happiness as mountains and smiles and laughter and true body tingling happiness instead of this hell I’m living in now.

It’s exhausting getting through the day. Counting the minutes until it’s over. The obstacles never stop coming. The problems never cease. You can’t ever catch a break. They say to make the most of it..but really, the most isn’t much.

You are who you are,

Brilliantly Lost